Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Uncommon Women on Common Ground

I love to Network. I'm far more comfortable in a large room full of strangers than I am anywhere. I'm not sure why.

 Maybe it's because I got married when I was very young. My husband was in the Air Force and I was 20 when I moved from the West Coast (Oregon) to the East Coast (Massachusetts.) Other than my husband, I didn't know a soul. Every person I met was a stranger. I was lonely and I wanted to make friends. So I learned to introduce myself to almost anyone. I learned the only way to learn about being in the military was to ask. Over the course of 10 years and two overseas tours to Germany, I became excellent at developing quick relationships so that I could get directions, find a dentist, or hire a babysitter.

It wasn't until we moved back to the States in 1995 and started my own business, Extraordinary People, that I learned that there was a business term for all of this meeting & greeting. It was called Networking.
My first Networking event was a pre-conference function. The conference was put on my Women Inc., and was titled, "Uncommon Women on Common Ground." I didn't want to miss a thing. The Networking event took place the night before the program began. It lasted from 5-7pm. and involved wine and cheese. I'd never been to New York City and I'd never attended a conference. I came. I ate. I waited. I made small talk with a few people. I exchanged business cards and shook hands firmly (but not too firmly.) I had no idea what to expect. I secretly expected something magical to happen to me as a reward for attending this event. Other than the free food, there were no immediate results.

The next morning, I recognized two or three people from the Networking event the night before. I sat next to one in a breakout session and another at lunch. That evening I met a woman in the hotel lobby. 

When I arrived home I sent a brief note to everyone who had given me their business card. (I made a short note on the back of each so that I could remember them if I saw them again. Example: Carol Reed (brown hair, from Dallas, 2 kids, likes chocolate) When I returned home, I sent them each a short note saying to say hi and to invite them to stay in touch. (Whenever possible, I included something personal about them from my notes.)

For every 25 cards I sent, I got 3-4 responses. For every 3-4 responses, I'd make a deeper connection. 

I'm still friends with a woman I met at my second Women Inc conference in Long Beach, CA in 1996. She's a talented therapist from LA and her name is Trina O'Quinn. She was a wonderful resource then and a wonderful resource now.

 If you aren't sure how to Network, start by meeting people. Don't concentrate on collecting business cards. Concentrate on collecting relationships. Find something in common. Or discuss something memorable. Be a good listener. Be a good friend. Then follow up. Stay in touch. There is nothing magical about Networking. But there is something magical about the connections that you can make from Networking.

 Until next time...